pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
