no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
