when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
well I can't set my house on fire every night
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
