im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I want to be your penis for a week.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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