But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
barbara walters just said penis...
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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