she was so not down for the gang bang
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
