Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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