Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize