I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
