thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
no you cant smoke seaweed
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize