I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
