i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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