I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
