Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
