dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
