Three words: puerto rican gang bang
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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