So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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