You're a womanizer and a bitch.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
