Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize