Will you blow on my dice?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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