Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
