my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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