I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
