Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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