escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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