so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
