Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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