Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
