she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize