sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He did a backflip because drugs
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
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