What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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