forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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