Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
