i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
