So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
She even gives head with a lisp.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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