holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
