Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
