I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
It's rum buckets o'clock
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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