NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
