Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
