what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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