I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I got inside last night via doggy door
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
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