Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
