My liver just broke up with me...
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
