...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
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