Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
