hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize