do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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