I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
