i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
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